Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Which Way to Choose

What a difficult decision. I just don't know which way to go. So here is the deal. I have four lovely children. They are a joy in my life. Yes, there are those many times I must complain. I mean, raising kids is no easy task, but regardless, I can't imagine life without them. So last year when Logan was just over four months old we had an "unexpected whoopsie". I was fertile, I was not on birth control, and two weeks later my pregnancy test turned positive. Apparently our little girl didn't want to wait for me to be READY AGAIN. So, here she is and I love her to bits. Well, here I am again. Faced with the decision to choose a form of birth control. Last year, I chose none. Reason: THE PILL MAKES ME CRAZY. Ok, maybe not literally, but I know when I'm on it I feel more depressed, NO sex drive, pretty much a MOODY Queen. Every time I give it a try, the results are the same. I will be honest, I don't want to have more kids. How could I say such a thing??...I love my babies! I sometimes wish time would slow down. It even makes me sad when I see my tiny thing grow so fast. Who wouldn't want just millions of these tiny sweet spirits? So, it has nothing to do with those things. What it does have to do with is this: First, Affordability; We strive to provide the necessities for the ones we have. I don't want to rely on government to do that for me. Alex does his best, he has three jobs, and does a fantastic job being our provider. Second, House; We bought this house as a starter home. We had one child, now we have four. We are caught in the housing crisis, and because we care about our credit and living up to our "obligations", we are here to stay. We are squished, but we will survive. Third, Me; Can I be more selfish? I am 32, Alex is going on 37. I suffer with terrible varicose veins. And pregnancy just does not suit me. I just want to feel physically well so that I can play with and raise my kids. So decision time is here.

What form of Birth Control to use? I can't afford another "whoopsie" (although I'm really glad she is here). The pill? Do I just keep trying different ones till I fine "the best one"? Condoms? (that won't work) I was going to choose the IUD, but our insurance doesn't cover it, so it will cost us $850 out of pocket. So there are the more "permanent" choices. Vasectomy or getting tubes tied. Both covered by our insurance. I don't know why, I just don't want to do anything permanent. (Lets not take this to mean I want more kids). It just makes me nervous. So I want to know from any of my readers what would you do? If you've had the Mirena IUD, did you like it? How did the hormones affect you? Would you pay that much out of pocket?

17 comments:

  1. I am on the same boat as you. I don't want to anything permanent but want something for a long time. I did get an IUD after Tyce and I actually really liked it for about 16 months, then the hormones got to me. I started getting moody, PMS and gained water weight. It was really nice not to have worry about it though!! I'm really considering doing it again this time around, but not quite sure yet. Good luck with your decision!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I found your blog off of a friends blog and yep I read from time to time :) I had the mirena iud for almost two years and I LOVED it. No period, no cramping, no oopsie's. nothing. I only had it removed when we began trying for another baby. Otherwise I would totally recommend it. Good luck!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I had the mirena and it was okay. The thought of having it in there was hard for me. Plus I know 2 people with horror stories and tubal pregnancies from it now, so I wasn't going to do it again. My friend loves the Paragaurd IUD it's hormone free. I'm trying birthcontrol again... I'm giving it 1 1/2 more months before I start looking for something else.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I have the mirena IUD, and I LOVE it! I have VERY light periods if I even have one at all. I have had it since I had Scout because I can't take birth control pills or any other type of birth control because of my blood clot situation. This was the only method for me besides condoms. I have not had any trouble with mine, and I would totally recommend it. I love not having to worry about it, and it is there for 5 years.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Call me a blog stalker! I found your blog through a friend and read it from time to time. (Your family is adorable by the way!) Anyway, I've always had issues with the pill too and I've tried several. Each one had a different problem! I've also tried the depo shot and nuva ring. The depo is great for the first shot, then the mood swings kick in. The nuva ring is awesome! Its def worth looking into. Everyone is so different though and these are just my experiences. I've also heard great things about the iud.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I hear IUD makes you crazy. I am on just plain old YAZ and I feel fine. (Fine meaning sex is the last thing on my mind...HOORAY!);)
    What's the one that says "Monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday saturday sunday EVERYDAY...." that commercial is annoying but I think about it so way to go marketing team;)haha. Sorry girl no help here, I just hear IUD is no bueno.

    ReplyDelete
  7. After Kinley I got the Mirena IUD and have had it in for almost a year and I like it way better than any other birthcontrol method I have used like the Nuva ring and the pill. Lets face it birthcontrol sucks! Why can't the guys take a pill :) But the cost of the IUD to me would be the hold back for me. Luckily my insurance paid for it if they wouldn't of I would have done the nuva ring. Not sure if you looked into that or not but def a good alternative. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  8. After so many years of infertility, this is like greek to me...Karsten is my first experience with a wonderful whoopsie! We are currently discussing the possibility of options, but it may be a mute point! Good luck with your decisions...it sounds like you have some good information from others!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I had an IUD and loved it. The hormones didn't affect me in the least. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am VERY sensitive to hormones but I had the Mirena IUD for 2 years and it was great -- stopped my excessive bleeding and as far as I could tell it didn't exacerbate my depression. Got rid of it because I THOUGHT it was affecting my depression, but it wasn't. Ended up having to get a hysterectomy after that -- I don't recommend a permanent route.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Right? If you're sensitive to birth control - ask specifically to try one with a lower dose of hormones. Still works, and you don't feel like you're pregnant/crazy/etc. all the time. I know I did and I was worlds better. Regular birth control? Felt like I was pregnant all month long, month after month. Yikes.

    And before you fork out near a grand, I strongly recommend reading this:
    http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/straightfromthebottle/archive/2010/01/28/iudisasterville-epiblogue.aspx

    This lady has since associated a near dead libido with her Mirena as well. A dead libido might not matter to you - but it's definitely something to think about.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Boy Anna....lots of comments. It sounds like an IUD is a pretty risky thing to try for eight hundred bucks. I on't know what to tell you. I know the nuva ring is really low dose....and that might help but it might work. I was on it for a little while....never could get it to stay in correctly....I switched because it was becoming a hassle. but i havent that problem from anyone else, so it was probably just my problem.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I had the Mirena IUD while I was in Idaho and felt like the hormones were too much for me. When I got to Ohio, I replaced the Mirena with a Paraguard (copper) IUD. So I actually paid for 2 IUD's! :) But at least the copper is less expensive than the Mirena. I really love not having to worry about it from day to day, and I never even think about it being in me. My menstruation is a little heavier and my cramps are worse, but it is sooooo worth dealing with a little physical discomfort over the extra instability in my emotions.

    If I were you, I'd hold off doing anything permanent. I know I look at my current situation and think, "I'm definitely done having kids." But we are young. And life throws unexpected curveballs. I would wait. Modern medicine has given us so many options right now so that you don't have to make this decision prematurely. And especially if much of the decision is based off of your financial situation. An IUD is worth the money in my opinion. And supposedly a copper is actually the cheapest long-term birth control beyond something permanent.

    And if you are worried about the hormones in a Mirena (which I think you probably should be with your history), I'd just go straight to a copper. I meant to, but forgot to specify what I wanted with the nurse and she had only brought the Mirena. :) So I just went with it. Big mistake for me personally. But most of the people I know have the Mirena and like it. Very few people I talk to have the copper.

    Take it for what it's worth. I miss you, Anna!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Copper. Thats my vote. Its too expensive to go mirena if you have to pull it after a few months because the hormones made you crazy! I have tried them ALL. I cant be on ANY pills (even low dose ones) or the nuva ring (I got estrogen poisoning and crazy blood clots with that!) so if you are worried about side effects go with the ZERO hormone option! otherwise you might go nuts, have to discontinue use, and wind up with more whoopsies to love :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. So with the Copper One, here is my issue. I understand that it has no hormones, BUT will make periods harder and cramps worse. The more kids I've had, the worse mine already are. I mean they are AWFUL!! AWFUL! BAD! Without being on anything...I flow like a river and cramp like I'm in labor. No Joke. So I guess there is no win when it comes to preventing more surprises. Everything has a downside, and I guess I get to just pick which one I want to deal with. Thanks for all the advice. I am still open for more, and I guess I'll be having a discussion with my Dr. next week.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I have the Mirena and LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!! My ins. covered it though but I would have paid out of pocket for it anyways because I think it's worth it. My periods still come but are so light I barely need a pantyliner. I haven't really noticed any change in my mood or libido. I'm sure everyone is different but I've had nothing but good experience with this one. I have also heard the copper IUD is horrible for cramps and bleeding so I wouldn't go that route either. Good luck with your decicion!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Anna, Look at it this way......an IUD is cheaper than another whoopsie!!! I think I have told you that I have the Mirena and love it!!!! I think you absolutely need to talk to your doctor and ALL you options and the one that is right for you. With Mirena my cycles are lighter and no cramps. That is definitely worth looking in to. Good Luck!!!

    ReplyDelete